What the fu*k happened to her?


OMG I know! Where the hell did I go. My last blog post was November 23, 2018. Since then I have been silent. I didn’t even post my end of the year reading wrap-up like I normally do. I am sorry for that. I honestly do not think I will get to it. I didn’t get as much reading done as I normally do and it wasn’t the best reading year either. I did manage to read a handful of 4 and 5 star books.

My personal life has gotten in the way of my reading life. I am sad but I am ok also. As some of you know me and my kids dad split up and I moved out in June 2018. So I have been working on getting back on my feet. I am working a lot. I am a CNA at a nursing home. I work a lot. But I have managed to find an amazing facility to work at and my co-workers are now my family. I just finished my class to become a CMA (Medication Aide). I take my state test for that on Feb 14th. Happy Valentine’s Day to me! Monday I take the TABES entrance exam for LPN school. Hoping to get into the program from Fall 2019. I am proud of myself. I never thought I could do this, let alone on my own. Which has also proven to be difficult at times.

I have always had issues with being alone. When I’m alone my mind tends to wander and it’s not always a good thing. I tend to think the worst. Even though I was married for almost 8 years, I also felt alone and single for most of those years. I know I should work on me right now, concentrate on school and just love life and my new freedom and family but there is part of me that is freaking out because I am not in a relationship. Gah how do I do this? This last week all I have felt like doing is crying and I can’t find a good reason why I should be. It is probably a mix of things. My Parabaiti suggested starting a journal. To get all my thoughts out of my head. I know when I talk with my people it does help calm me down. So I will try a journal as well. Hopefully it helps. I just hate getting stuck in my own head. You might even seen a blog post of two that deals with all this crap. Who knows maybe someone that is going through something similar will reach out and we can be each others support.

So as far as reading goals for this year goes I don’t really have any. I set my Goodreads goal at 20 books. I will really only have from now until August to get any real reading done. After that my reading will be nursing books. But it will all be worth it when I graduate and become an LPN. I do plan on finishing up that last book in a few series I need to finish. I’ve been scared to finish them because that means the series is over. Other than that I am just going to go with what I am in the mood for.

Well that’s all I got for now. I will try to be around more. Towards the end of the year my blogs might turn more into surviving nursing school and less about books but oh well. Shit happens! Hope you stick around for a wild and crazy 2019 journey! Love you all!

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